20 things I learned on my ride-along with SWAT:

1. Kevlar is heavy. Man, was I sweating. And I was wearing the small, visitor one. The SWAT team’s weighed 45 pounds.
2. “Getting made” is making sergeant.
3. A SWAT guy panics if he forgets his helmet at the first raid. And then everyone laughs at and mocks (with high pitched voices) the poor guy who panicked.
4. They like to talk about iCarly and who’s gay on Sponge Bob between raids.
5. And if they think you are going to tell anyone they talked about iCarly they get mad. So mad I had to promise not to use names.
6. The sport of curling seems to fascinate them.
7. A SWAT wagon can be transformed from anything. The unit’s first was an old bread truck. Their current wagon is a retired ambulance tricked out and painted black.
8. It’s hard to take notes during a raid in the dark (yes, I’m a dork).
9. Little kids can sleep through anything.
10. The pre-raid briefing where they get the layout of the house and the plan of attack is short. Like scary short.
11. They like to joke around on the way to the raid, but ten seconds before they hit the house the sergeant yells “kill the master,” the interior lights go out, and they are all business. The switch happens in a split second…and yeah, it’s cool as hell!
12. One should not stand under the bright street lamp while SWAT is raiding the dark house with no exterior lights. You make yourself a giant target.
13. Don’t laugh when the helpful SWAT guy behind you turns on a light so you can walk down the dark stairs and he says, “Don’t mind the fact that this light is attached to my assault weapon which is pointed at your back.”
14. They say cool things like “knock and announce,” “stealthing it,” and “hop and pop.”
15. The tall, tough SWAT guy talking to a little kid while the house is being searched, asking questions like “Which sport is your favorite?” and “What position do you play?” is adorable. I think my uterus skipped a beat. And I’m not even having kids.
16. The shy, quiet guy on SWAT may just be the sexiest one.
17. All the uniformed, gun-carrying SWAT guys got hotter as the night went on and the adrenaline started pumping. The phrase “I’d do any of them” or something similar was uttered on the drive home (and no, it wasn’t me who said it, but I do believe I agreed).
18. They like to read the books in the house they raid. The guy guarding the suspects was reading one about what to do to make yourself an un-datable man. He was checking off the items on the list that applied to his sergeant.
19. When they are waiting outside in the dark after the raid, they should not stand so close to each other when I’m around. And one of them should NOT kneel facing the other’s crotch because you know where my brain went.
20. And the last thing I learned on my SWAT ride-along: I’m a chicken shit.

Thanks to the SWAT guys and the men and women of vice for allowing us to see their work and for their dedication to the job. I appreciate all the answers to our questions and information you shared. You guys rock!!

Sloan

On a personal note this week, I want to wish my mom a happy retirement! And a happy second retirement to my dad who’s about to finish up with his job too! They just bought a motor home and GPS. I’m thinking we may never see them again.

In all seriousness I wish them a relaxing, joyful, and entertaining retirement. They deserve it.

I owe both my parents a huge thanks for teaching me the value of hard work. They have strong work ethics and give their all to whatever they do. I’ve always admired that about them. Well, actually when I was little I thought that was how everyone went about their work. Then I grew older, got out in the real world, and realized not everyone is like that.

So thanks, Mom and Dad. I owe part of my determination and dedication with my writing to you. Happy retirement to you both!

And just for fun I’m including a pic of the folks. And since they’d probably kill me if I posted anything recent, it’s one of my favorites from their earlier days.

“Time is limited, so I better wake up every morning fresh and know that I have just one chance to live this particular day right, and to string my days together into a life of action, and purpose.”

-Lance Armstrong

I had several days in a row this week filled with inspiration for my latest work in progress. It felt great because the week before was filled with frustration. Writing is hard, like really hard sometimes. And it’s even harder when I’m in a bad mood. So I try to start each writing session with the most positive attitude I can muster, try to start each day with optimism. Sometimes that doesn’t always work out, but I try.

Quotes like this one help remind me of that. I hope they inspire (or at least entertain) you as well.
Sloan

I was the guest blogger over at Fiction with Friction yesterday, talking about my first book and my first love. I’m feeling a bit sentimental on both counts, so I thought I’d share the link to that post for today’s “For the Love of” Friday blog.

The post is titled: I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.
You can check it out at: http://bit.ly/ahTf0o

I’d love to hear about your own first love story. Feel free to leave a comment here or on the Fiction with Friction blog.

Hope you have a great day,
Sloan

Writers are usually very solitary people. We spend hours and hours in our own heads, playing with thoughts and images until we get a story poured out onto the “paper.” We spend a lot of time listening to made-up people. It’s rewarding and challenging, but it can also suck when you get stuck on something. Group brainstorming can help.

Last weekend I spent two days with a group of local writers. We rotated between individual writing time and group brainstorming. It was a rare chance for me to get input and story inspiration from others, as well as an opportunity to help brainstorm in other genres. It was a productive, fun weekend. The entire process helped me get a jump-start on some conflict ideas for my next book.  (And let me just say, I’m so mean to my characters…it’s worth it though).

That’s the great thing about group brainstorming. No matter how many of the ideas I end up using, the entire process motivated me and also sparked my own ideas after I got home and my mind kept running through my story.

Thanks to my writing pals: Connie, Jennie, Lesly, Rita, and KateLynn. You guys rock!! I loved hearing about your stories. Best of luck on your writing!

Any other writers out there ever try group brainstorming, either online or in person? What process works for you?

I’d love to hear about it.
Sloan Parker

I love being a writer.

I love brainstorming new characters and figuring out what their story is and how to tell it.

I love the editing process, the layering of story and characterizations.

But some days being a writer just plain sucks.

It can be hard to work through the self-doubt, the frustrations with a project, with the characters, with holes in the plot.

This morning was one of those days for me. The conflict for Breathe is a difficult setup for a romance story (I never said I take the easy road). People tend to have rather surprised and skeptical reactions when they hear what I’m writing about, and that fosters some doubt about whether or not I’ve wasted the last seven months. Usually, I’m able to stomp on the doubt and crush the hell out of it.

Some days it takes a little more effort than that.

So this morning I re-read a few of my favorite scenes from Breathe. They helped to remind me why I’m telling this story, what I love about it, and how happy I am with the way it’s turned out. Breathe has become the story I envisioned it to be, and I’m excited to be getting near the end of the writing process. I’m doing a final polish this month, working out a few kinks before I submit it.

It felt odd to use my own writing to cheer myself up, but it worked and I’m back to editing for the rest of the day.

So yeah, I love being a writer again.

With the close of every year, I try to take a few minutes to remember all the wonderful moments of my life, the friends and family and significant times that have made the year special for me.

As 2009 came to a close, I took a moment to remember one special little guy who brightened many days for me, but unfortunately lost his battle with cancer this past year. Today, I thought I’d share some of my favorite photos of him. He was a big part of what made me smile every day, and I thank my niece for suggesting I take a look at this homeless little guy all those years ago.

Jesse was smart and regal and full of live. And he was a fighter. He was sick from the minute I adopted him. Several times my vet looked at me in that caring way he has and tried to tell me he didn’t think Jesse would have a long life, that this time it might be the end. But Jesse would have none of that. He came back to full force many times over and lived to play another day. He was one of the gentlest, smartest pets I’ve ever known. It was hard sometimes to tell he was blind.

Thanks to these pictures, Jesse still makes me smile.

I hope you all have a wonderful, healthy, happy 2010!!

Sloan Parker

I recently read this comment from Ellen in her list titled: What Ellen DeGeneres Knows for Sure (She Thinks)

“I know for sure I would never change any of the hard times I went through in my life. Because it was in those times that I grew the most and gained the most perspective.

It’s our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting. Are they fun when they happen? No. But they are what make us unique. And that’s what I know for sure…I think.”

Ellen DeGeneres

This really is a hard thing to accept when you’re in the middle of a crisis or painful time in your life, but I know I wouldn’t trade most of those moments if it meant my life wouldn’t be what it is now — if I wouldn’t be who I am now. I love where I am. I love where I’m going. I love the family I’ve built.

That said, there are people I miss, losses I’d do almost anything to change. Logically, I know I can’t undo any of those things, so in a way, I look at them from a distance (now that time has passed), and I accept them. Those moments have made me stronger, have helped me become who I am. I hope they have given me strength to handle any of the painful moments to come. We all have them. They can’t be avoided. I like what Ellen said about how they “give us layers of depth and make us interesting.” I hope that’s true for me.

Here’s hoping all of you have many, many good days ahead. And when you do have a challenging day, that it passes by quickly and you are stronger for it.

Thanks for stopping by,
Sloan Parker

With everything going on today — cooking, cleaning, setting up tables and chairs, and doing so many dishes for my mom that my hands will pretty much be in soapy water all day long — it’s easy to put off thinking about what it is we are truly thankful for. So before we head off to my folks, I wanted to take a minute to reflect on this past year and all the wonderful people and things in my life I am grateful for. It’s not a complete list, but it’s who and what have made this year one of the best of my life.

1. My immediate family. For me that’s Rosie, my partner, and our three cats. They love me even when I’m an ass. Even when I’m crazy. Even when I get sucked into my world of fictional people and places and forget to get off my damn ass and live a little. Thanks, Rosie, for pulling me out of the chair once in a while. Thanks for always loving and supporting me. Thanks for giving me an unending supply of passion to put into my work. Thanks for making me laugh every single day. And thanks to the three little felines who are more entertaining than a little TV any day.
2. The rest of my family. Especially my mom and dad who are proud of me for my first book contract. Even though they will never read a single word of it, they give their unending support every day, and I love them for that. And sorry, Dad, that I can’t seem to write a book where, as you say, “I leave the sex up to the reader’s imagination” so that you can feel comfortable reading it. Thanks to both of you for loving me, not in spite of who I am, but because of it.
3. All my new friends in RWA. I was hesitant to join the national organization and local chapter, but you have all made it a wonderful experience for me.
4. My publisher (Loose Id) and editor (Antonia). Thanks for taking a chance on an unknown. Thanks for believing in More. And thanks for helping me make it better.
5. Luke, Richard, and Matthew and the muse that helped me find them. I’ve worked at my writing since I was in the second grade when I wrote my first book and entered a local competition. It hasn’t always been an easy path, but there’s something about me that makes me a storyteller. I’m grateful for that. It’s been one hell of a ride so far.

Happy day to everyone!
Sloan Parker
www.sloanparker.com

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about marriage. My anniversary was last week. My partner and I celebrate from our first date in high school. We both dated other people after that (when you’re bisexual, it sometimes takes time to figure things out in your own head), but we were in love, even then. One of the things Rosie would love in life is to be married to me. Too bad the US government and far too many citizens of the great state of Ohio don’t want that outcome.

I also wrote a short story for I DO TWO, a charity anthology in support of marriage equality. (Side note: if it isn’t selected for the book, I may post it as free fiction on my site in January). So, it’s been on my mind lately.

I’ve never been a huge supporter of marriage licenses. I don’t think couples need a legal document to be committed and spend a life together. But I have to say, it irks me to no end that I can’t give the love of my life one of the things she desires most, that I’m not legally allowed to marry the person I share a home with, a dining room table with, a bed with, a life with. We’ve lived together for 18 years.

Here’s one of the statements I read after Maine voters repealed a state law that would have allowed same-sex couples to wed. It reminded me there are many straight people who care, who have made the cause their cause too.

“I sat in my hotel room and watched the sun rise from my eighth-story window and cried. I wished I had done more.

But a new day was dawning. A different day and a new fight for marriage equality. It will soon be time again for us as Mainers and as a nation to come together. Gay or straight, the fight is in each one of us, and we must take it. We must.”

Dana Hernandez
A straight white married mother of two young children
Reporting Election Night outcomes for Advocate.com

Thank you to Dana and everyone who cares enough to realize this isn’t about your marriage or taking something from you, it’s about giving a basic right to others. A basic right that grants so many other rights to the couple the minute they are married. Rights my partner and I can’t duplicate, no matter how much money we give to our attorney to draft legal documents. Marriage in the US offers over 1,000 Federal rights and benefits. And this does not include the hundreds more offered by every state.

Thanks for stopping by today,
Sloan Parker
twitter.com/SloanParker